In theaters. Rated R, 113 minutes. Trailer.
Not every new moviemaking technique works. Exhibit A - Beowulf. Advertised as a revolutionary advancement in cinema by the wondrous Robert Zemeckis, the humans in Beowulf look more like a leper colony of Botox abusers.
The story is one of the oldest ever told. King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins) has a son, Grendel (Crispin Glover, looking like an Island of Dr. Moreau extra or Gollum's uglier big brother) with a shapeshifting demon/lizard queen (Angelina Jolie). Grendel terrorizes the Danes under Hrothgar's rule, and the brave Beowulf (Ray Winstone) comes to kill him, which he does in short order. He then goes to kill the lizard queen, but the fact that she looks like Angelina Jolie and wants him to make her a mommy again changes his plans. Click the link below for the rest of the review.She promises him he will rule forever with her blessing, and he returns to the kingdom to take over for Hrothgar. Cut to 25 years later and there are new attacks from a demon as when Grendel was alive. Beowulf goes to fight the demon and kills him in spectacular fashion.
I couldn't have hated this movie more. The motion-capture technology made
the humans look creepy and the horses look like they had polio. Only about 30% of the actors' faces were animated, so they just looked frozen or over-botoxed the whole time. The film opens in a mead hall where burp jokes and stupid womanizing jokes are considered funny. The dialogue is modern, but not funny or effective. The only good parts of this film involve Angelina Jolie (ahem) and some of the perspective shots, as well as the fight with the flying dragon at the end of the film. The story has some urgency and lessons about the lure of power and the weakness of men, but they are wasted in this stupid, ugly and sophomoric waste of time.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Beowulf - C-
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8 comments:
This movie is showing on the local IMAX in 3D so I'm somewhat tempted...because hey who doesn't think 3D is cool and my mom wouldn't let me see Jaws 3(D) when I was in grade school.
Beyond that I can't think of any other reason I'd be lured to see this film...not even Angelina..I'm not a fan...I'd have a hard time ponying up the cash for this movie just based of the CGE. Namely, because I feel like I'd spend most of my time looking for an X-box controller so I could beat Grindal.
did you see it in 3-D? i'm going to try and catch it just because a 3-D film so rarely comes out.
not yet, but I might this weekend.
I didn't see it in 3D. I should have, I guess, just for to see AJ in "4D".
Article about the technology:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/11/18/movies/18kehr.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
Okay, i caught the 3D version, which i would give a B-. It has all the flaws lawyer mentioned, but it is also in 3D, which is a lot of fun. I went and saw it with my brother, and we both agreed it was a good time but would have been pretty pathetic if not for the format. Several times I found myself ducking left and right to escape spears, arrows, and other items that were hurtling off the screen towards us. The animated characters look good when they are not suppose to look like the actors that play them. It's when Angelina Jolie or Anthony Hopkins characters are on the screen that you realize that they are just a little off.... Also, I don't know how you rate a cartoon, but the nudity here is extensive and realistic enough that I'd give this one an R rating. Parents beware of that.
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