Valentine's Day - D+

In theaters. Rated PG-13, 125 minutes (!). Trailer.

A paltry movie crop combined with a Valentine's Day outing with Bride culminated in an ill-advised viewing of Valentine's Day. With a great trailer and a basic premise and structure similar to the enjoyable He's Just Not That Into You, Director Garry Marshall (Pretty Woman), an allstar cast and the studio were able to bamboozle $50million before the word of mouth will sink this uninteresting and idiotic film. The film follows a bazillion storylines on Valentine's Day in Los Angeles and shakes out every cliche in the book with hardly a shred of character development or any actual laughs. Click below for more on a scary VD:

Let's start with what was at least okay: Anne Hathaway as a 'adult phone entertainer' on the side and her budding relationship with Topher Grace (interesting enough), Taylor Swift (funny sending herself up), and the always great Jennifer Garner. Each of these components had some life and interesting angles, but only got about 5 or 6 minutes of screentime so it didn't make up the difference. The worst parts of the film were George Lopez (always terrible), Jessica Biel, Queen Latifah and Hector Elizondo/Shirley McLaine.

The worst part about the whole experience was the audience reaction - laughing at only 'poop' jokes and 'aaaahing' at all the processed sugary moments. Ashton Kutcher actually wasn't that bad since he wasn't really acting, just playing himself.

This one is instantly forgettable and an insult to audiences and its actors.